The Whisperer of the Abyss:
Sandy’s Never-Ending Monday Rants - Journal Entry 19
Fiction that's based on real life. All names were changed, just in case.
Lasagna is like Pasta
Went on a date with Lasagna.
I wore my outfit, picked a nice coffee shop
with outdoor seats and bought my favourite coffee.
Lasagna was late just like Pasta. He never offered to buy me a coffee, so right from the start, I knew something would go awry.
Lasagna was almost three metres tall, resembling X-men. Later, some people told me he was most likely taking Human Growth Hormones, and these men usually have anger problems.
Remember how Ricollo screamed at me, like a crazy lady, showing his feminine side? Then there was Pasta, who cared about other women more, the lukewarm one. And Mooch, who looked to date a mother who would do everything for him. They all imposed too much.
Back to Lasagna.
There was a clear connection when I diverted the conversation to the arts.
Everything was good until Lasagna insisted on driving me home. His car felt like a metal bathtub that would fall apart any second. I held onto the seat, not to get thrown all over the place and out the window - the seat belt seemed useless. I heard people shouting in the background - they praised the metal bathtub on wheels. Having little interest in cars, I found it odd.
Usually, I have a hug test. I mentioned that there is no kissing on a first date ever - so that there are no surprises. Lasagna ignored what I had explained, just like he ignored the parking gate ramp while driving. He tried to kiss me, and I showed him my vitamin C from my purse. It scared him so much that he never contacted me again.
Lasagna never offered me a coffee from the start, and that spoke volumes on its own. Aside, there are plenty of other ways people can ruin a date, but this one was a full-proof indicator for me, maybe not for others.
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